Feng Zhi Wei suddenly hated herself for being too uncaring and callous in the past. Why did she never think carefully about how someone like Gu Nan Yi survived during those three years?

But, did she not think of it or did she not dare to think of it? 

“I have drank and eaten my fill. I still have to get up early tomorrow, let’s call it for tonight.” Seeing Feng Zhi Wei sitting there staring blankly, Hua Qing stretched lazily, stood up, and scooped up Feng Zhi Wei in one swoop, “I am stuffed, come with me to walk a bit, otherwise I am afraid I won’t be able to sleep.” 

Feng Zhi Wei forced out a smile and said, “Alright.” Everyone there is used to being together so each went their way without much fanfare. Feng Zhi Wei took Hua Qing and went for a walk in the backyard garden. 

It’s a perfect night scenery at the end of spring, Although the flowers are all half closed in the night there is still a subtle graceful charm to them. The moonlight flowed like milk over those half-blooming flowers, revealing a bit of bright red and purple color with their tantalizing beauty. 

Taking a deep breath of the sweet fragrance that is a mixture of all the flowers swaying in the night, Hua Qing’s brows relaxed, “I am leaving the Imperial Capital tomorrow! Finally!” 

“Don’t like it here?” Feng Zhi Wei asked with a smile.

“What do you think?” Hua Qing narrowed her eyes and sneered, “One examination has already shown me what the Imperial Capital is!”

She suddenly turned around, grabbed Feng Zhi Wei’s hand, and said earnestly, “Zhi Wei, I don’t know what’s in your head, but I feel, even though it looks like you are on the fast track to a glorious future but in actuality you are also walking on the cliff with every dangerous step titering on the very edge. Accompanying the king is like accompanying a tiger. The higher you climb the more dangerous it is. You are a lone minister (meaning she does not belong to any fraction), and one who everyone is jealous of at that. Like this case with the exam question leak, once the wall starts to falter, everyone will rush forward to crumble it. Who will help you then?” 

Ah, she has also thought of this—- Feng Zhi Wei smiled slightly, “Are you trying to persuade me to be a bird who selects the finest tree to perch on?” (A bird who selects the finest tree to perch on- a Chinese saying that is often used for when people choose the situation or people that is the most beneficial to them.)

“I am trying to persuade you to at the very least make the appearance that you have. Like what you advised me just now regarding the art of being dirty with the rest of my fellow officials.” Hua Qing said, “I don’t care if you have to play both sides or if you have to pretend to be at one camp while your heart is in another, none of that matters to me, I just want you to be able to stand firm amidst the whirlwind of the Imperial Court.”

“His Majesty wants me to be a lone minister.” Feng Zhi Wei said softly,  “Wei Zhi’s fame is too big. Someone like that, His Majesty will not rest easy no matter whose camp he joined. The old man has not lost control of the court. No one else’s camp is more important than being in his.” 

“That’s neither here nor there.” Hua Qing rolled her eyes at her, “You clearly know what I mean. You know I am not asking you to join someone’s camp publicly.” 

Feng Zhi Wei fell silent and smiled thoughtfully. Hua Qing observed her expression carefully, but could not figure out if Feng Zhi Wei still retaining the part of her memory that was supposed to be lost. She is not good at beating around the bush, so after thinking a bit she finally decided to just say it directly, “It looks to me His Highness’ heart could be counted as sincere towards you. I don’t care what you are actually thinking, but even if it’s for the sake of yourself gaining a firm foothold, you might as well get along with him.” 

“Of course.” Feng Zhi Wei said lightly.

Hua Qing looked at her, wanting to say something more but then stopped. Feng Zhi Wei smiled and said, “You were the one who had tried to persuade me to stay away from him but now you are singing a different tune.” 

“That’s because the situation has changed.” Hua Qing sighed softly, “As of now, he is the most promising prince and you are the most famous minister. If you can’t be used by him, I am very afraid that in the future…” 

Feng Zhi Wei remained silent, her eyes as soft as the half-closed flowers in the night, without any special emotions in them. 

Hua Qing’s voice suddenly became softer than the wind.

“You told me back then, you wanted to learn to cherish the rare emotions of this life, wanted to be bold and follow your heart once in a while. And now…is your heart, still there?”

Is your heart still there? 

The simplest question, the hardest answer. 

It was quiet all around, even the night insects refused to chirp, the flowers gathered in their branches and leaves, the moon had lost its shine, and everything was waiting for an answer, but that person resisted the world with silence. 

After a long time, there came a sigh.

After a while, Hua Qing suddenly walked away. Feng Zhi Wei didn’t move but stayed leaning against the pavilion railing, lost in thought as she stared at the ripples in the pond, remembering that night in Prince Chu’s manor, there was a woman who lay in a pool of blood, asking her questions sorrowfully. 

In yet another while, there came sounds of footsteps again. Hua Qing came back, Feng Zhi Wei still didn’t move but something was suddenly shoved into her hand from behind. 

The light green wood, with a clear and elegant color, had a beautiful natural pattern of beautiful dancing wood texture, with a golden devil’s snarl fower branded on the edge. 

Feng Zhi Wei stared at the box blankly. 

This is the Phoenix tailwood letter box Ning Yi had sent. 

Something that should have long ago rotted away at the bottom of the river on the Grasslands, but it somehow has appeared here. 

The box was still intact. The golden branding had not even rusted despite the fact she clearly remembered that she had personally thrown the box, stuffed full of letters, into the Chang River. 

“That day when you threw this, I was nearby.” Hua Qing said slowly behind her, “I was pregnant and didn’t dare to go into the water so I let Chun Yu secretly go into the water to fish it out. It was dark and you had already gone back to the tent so you didn’t know.” 

It was a long bit before Feng Zhi Wei asked, “Why?”

“I just think that the first lovely memory one experienced in life should not be given up so easily.” Hua Qing replied softly, “That would make me feel regretful.”

“Then why give it to me now?”

Hua Qing fell silent for a moment before finally replying with a smile, “I am leaving and who knows when I’ll get to see you again. There is no reason to keep this anymore.  Now that I have returned it to its owner, it’s up to you whether you want to throw it away again or keep it.” 

She gave a shrug and happily walked out of the pavilion. As she walked away, she could be heard muttering with relief, “I finally returned it, it was so troublesome to have to carry it everywhere…” Without turning her head, she added, “Don’t come to send me off tomorrow. I am afraid you will cry. That’s it. Goodbye.” 

Feng Zhi Wei watched her striding away, her hand gently caressing the box in hand, something in her eyes shimmered. 

All text copyright @ www.Ninja-Reflection.com

This book really has some of the most memorable friendships I have ever read. I adored Hua Qing’s character so much and love her unwavering friendship with our heroine. I was SO excited when I saw her character show up in the drama, but was severely disappointed that the drama ended up having to give Hua Qing’s a very anticlimactic death. It not only was bizarre to kill Hua Qing’s character when she definitely did not die in the novel, but it was also an atrocity to kill her off in such a nondescript manner. If the drama really HAD to kill off Hua Qing’s then I would’ve rather they had killed her in the scene where she had fought alongside our heroine while they were surrounded on all sides by the enemy soldiers (unfortunately this scene was not in the drama but it is in the novel). Feng Zhi Wei had always idolized Mama Feng who was once the legendary female general but was never able to receive the love she craved from Mama Feng. While I don’t think Hua Qing is a mother figure to our heroine, especially since Hua Qing treats our heroine more like her liege, but I do think our heroine is finally able to receive the love she had always yearned from someone that very much would’ve reminded what she imaged her adopted mother should’ve been/could’ve been. 

ps. A reader had asked about a social media platform for this site. The answer is that I don’t have one currently but would like to have one sometime in the future. I would probably use the social platform to post dramas I am currently watching, drama/novel updates, upcoming shows, and honestly, just things that are not long enough to write a whole blog post about but things I figure you guys might still be interested in. Here is the question for you all, what platform do you guys use, and which one do you think would be a good fit for this site?

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