The blood on his fingers seems exceptionally red against the smooth and pale skin on her neck. Her eyes were wide open but there were no fear and pleading in them. A mist slowly covers those eyes but it wasn’t because of tears but just how her eyes naturally were. A mist that is like a dream, like a flower that blooms right before sunrise…a flower in the dark…lonely.
His fingers trembled suddenly.
His heart is at war.
She knows too many secrets. She is so cunning that she could possibly spoil all his plans. She is the poison that he has to get rid of at all cost. Yet, faced with her silent and steady gaze, his fingers seem to have lost all their strength to tighten their grip.
If she begged, he would kill her.
If she cried, he would kill her.
But when she does nothing and just calmly accepts his intention to kill, he suddenly remembers everything he has seen since the day he met her.
Like him, fighting all alone, a soul unwilling to accept her fate.
His fingers slowly let go…like a gust of storm that had suddenly slowed itself when passing through a field of flower, giving up the destruction that should’ve come to the tender and beautiful.
When his fingers finally left her neck completely, he lets out a silent sigh in his heart as he comforts himself with the excuse that he can’t kill her right now, there are too many people outside, he wouldn’t be able to explain…hmm…yes, that’s the reason.
Gingerly touching her own neck. There was no finger marks, no feeling of suffocation, in fact, she didn’t even feel any hint of malice from him. However, Zhi Wei knew for a certainty that out of all of their many interactions, this is the one time he truly wanted to kill her.
Just now, when she was closest to death than she has ever been, Zhi Wei’s mind was a complete blank. All her strength and quick wit gone, she had simply stared at him, wanting to know what he was thinking.
With no clue why he gave up on killing her, Zhi Wei was unusually silent for a long moment before she picks up the medicine bottle and slowly walks over to Ning Yi’s side.
Silent the whole time while Zhi Wei helped him take off his outer robe then carefully put the medicine on him, Ning Yi was extremely cooperative. The tense and dangerous atmosphere suddenly switched to one of comfortable silence, Zhi Wei pulls down the robe until the man’s smooth silky skin is exposed, revealing the taut strong muscle that hides the explosive power of one who is a trained fighter. It is a beautiful body but Zhi Wei’s whole attention is focused on the gaping wound on the man’s shoulder where the bone is almost exposed. Unconsciously drawing a sharp intake of breath at the bloody sight, Zhi Wei has no idea how Ning Yi chased after the assassins after suffering such a severe wound.
His dark expression receding slightly when he sees the grimace on Zhi Wei’s face, Ning Yi’s eyes brightens a bit.
Carefully, Zhi Wei dumps a bit of the medicine powder on the wound causing Ning Yi’s body to jerk in response. Zhi Wei immediately asks “It hurts?” then bends down to blow softly on the wound.
So amused by Zhi Wei’s unexpected response, Ning Yi whose mood has lightened considerably by now asks “What are you doing?”
Mildly embarrassed, Zhi Wei explains “I remember when I was little and scraped my knee, my mom would blow on my wound…”
His smile fades as Zhi Wei’s voice trail off and he remembers why she ran away from her uncle’s manor.
After a few moments, Ning Yi gently replies “It’s good that someone blew on your wound…”
Taken aback, Zhi Wei casts a disbelieving glance towards Ning Yi- Is he trying to comfort her?
Promptly regretting his words the second he said them, a somewhat frustrated Ning Yi coughed and stopped talking. Biting her lips, Zhi Wei bends down to continue on what she was doing, unaware of the wisp of hair that has fallen on Ning Yi’s shoulder while she did so. Slightly ticked by the wisp of hair, Ning Yi instinctively wants to move his shoulder away…but then he suddenly doesn’t want to.
The sound of loud arguments from the outside floated in. Ning Yi knows he should pay attention to it but the words have become gibberish to his ears and he is feeling too lazy to care.
Not giving heed to the arguments outside either, Zhi Wei’s attention is still focused on the gaping wound and the reason for it.
Pierced by a sudden ache in her heart, Zhi Wei blurts out without thinking “Why come!”
His body stiffens, Ning Yi turns slowly to stare at Zhi Wei.
Zhi Wei doesn’t say anything more- Why come? Why such an elaborate trap, why go to the extent of hurting yourself when there is no one around who would even ask you if it hurts? To sit on top of this world, on the throne, the glory of it all…is it really worth it?
Reading everything she wanted to say in her eyes, Ning Yi didn’t get mad but instead replies after a long moment of silence “You don’t understand.”
Still not saying anything, Zhi Wei thinks to herself “Perhaps I understand more than you would guess.” You lost your mother at a young age. You are harboring some sort of illness. You are extremely smart but is suppressed by your older brothers. You are good friends with Xin Ziyan but have to pretend to be strangers. You had control of Qing Ming college first but then were forced to turn it over to the Crown Prince. The Emperor’s indifference to you means you have to give the Crown Prince your allegiance but then thanks to his foolishness, you are constantly his scapegoat. You have too many secrets and hidden wounds but no one has ever cared so you learned to be even more ruthless towards yourself.
Reaching for the fabric strips on the table, Zhi Wei slowly wraps it around Ning Yi’s wound and says in a nonchalant voice “You have let me go today so one day, I will also let you go once.”
Unfazed when Ning Yi looks at her with a stunned expression, Zhi Wei returns his gaze calmly.
After a moment, Ning Yi laughs and shakes his head without saying anything.
He has vowed to control his life in his own hands. And what he wants, he will get. She is extremely intelligent but even then, how could she possibly have the chance to control his life?
Reading the doubt in his expression, Zhi Wei doesn’t bother to argue with him but just smiles as she finishing tying the last knot and says “It’s all done.”
All text copyright @ www.Ninja-Reflection.com
Thank you!!!!
Wishing you a very happy new year and all the best for the coming year 😘
Love this translation, is it the beginning of our hero and ZW feelings towards each other beginning to come to like. I like the novel exposure of describing how they are feeling. In the drama, you saw the transformation as well, but I love reading too. Thank you. Happy New Year. I know that you mention that our hero worked for the crown prince, could you explain? There was a lot said?
So in most of these “battle for the throne” type of situations, if you are one of the Emperor’s sons, you would really only have two choices: 1. Be a contender and come out either as the emperor or…dead (or at the very least lifelong imprisonment). 2. Choose the brother you think will most likely win and be their “supporter” with the understanding that if that particular brother is successful then you will also get lots of benefits. (This is often the only choice for Princes whose mother doesn’t come from a powerful family…as is in our hero’s case.)
In a fight for the throne there is no middle ground so in order to survive, one must take a side. In the drama, our hero is the powerless prince who was recently released from imprisonment. In the novel, our hero is nowhere nearly as powerless as he is in the drama since he had wisely positioned himself in the Crown Prince’s camp so there was no imprisonment and he had plenty of time to cultivate his own resources.
This has made my Monday mornings worthwhile. Thanks again, I’m usually the “ silent “ kind, I don’t leave comments, but in this case I have to appreciate the time and effort you’ve put into it. I was so devastated after the last episode that had it not been for this thread I probably would have gone in a whithdrawal spin.
Happy new year 2019 to yourself and all the fellow readers. !!
Thank you so much for the translations! I look forward to them. You make my day. I wish you a happy new year filled with joy and prosperity and much time to translate!
Ah, the book is quite different… I need more, i’m embarrassingly addicted. Lol. So thank you for the translations! I like the novel’s ending much more and wish they would have given them a happy ending. And i’m still left wondering why she died in the drama… I love her character so much it was heartbreaking to see her be so sad and alone, and that when she died he was basically imprisoned as Emperor without anyone who truly loved him….
And then I got it as I was just re watching episode 42 of the drama and a few things made me think…. When she is in prison he plays a song for her and then gifts her with the flute. (What is the song and does it have significance?) Then he says Racoons are like cats they have nine lives and they always come back. And she also says she’ll certainly bother him in the next life too. So I wondered what the significance of this was because, in her death scene she plays this song on the flute…and I think she wanted him to hear it and know something from it… I think she was trying to comfort him like he did for her, as he is in his own prison (the palace as Emperor). And that she couldn’t be imprisoned in the palace and that she’d come back in the next life to “bother him”…but it also made me go, oh, she did it all for him. It’s bittersweet for sure. She would not be used as a tool to hurt him. But it made me mad because he tried so hard to keep her alive and she kinda threw it in his face. But I think that he also didn’t reveal his feelings and he lied and always left her questioning his real feelings… Even at the end he pretty much is forcing her to marry it feels like. And she was not one to be controlled, and he did… so it tainted their feelings for each other. Even the Go board was a metaphor for their feelings… one is always trying to trap the other, and come to hate each other in the end…. it was very cleverly written though… so alas I must read the translations to give Ning Yi his happy ending… unless if it was a true cliff hanger ending for season 2???
Yup, there was a lot of thought put into certain lines and scenes. They weren’t accidental like the Go board in particular. The drama staff also said so in the bts videos. While I understand NY idea of living on as the just Emperor, I still cannot fathom ZW’s suicide, it just doesn’t fit her character in the drama. And then it hit me when I saw in the drama that it snowed as NY was on his way to her house AND it was the moment of her suicide. I believe that she, as in the novel, faked her death which happened in winter during a battle and NY rushed there to find her body afterwards. I doubt there’s going to be another season, it is kind of a bittersweet open ending.
Loved the translation. I’m surprised she didn’t instinctively want to remove his grip on the neck. Is it because she was mesmerizing by him, or was she really resigned to the thought of letting him kill her, or did she somehow know he wouldn’t bear to kill her?
I hope this is the beginning of them working collaboratively as officials.
Wow adicta a las traducciones, gracias Ninja, feliz año.
Al parecer ZW es la que más temprano se da cuenta de sus sentimientos.
I finished the Netflix drama a week ago and was so very frustrated with the ending that I haven’t been able to let it go…which lead me to web browsing and finally to your site. Which in turn has made me very happy!
It drove me absolutely insane at the complete 180 ZW’s character took in the last 20 episodes. We got to know her as this strong inventive person and she basically just gives up after her mother and brothers death and just cried for the next 20 episodes. It drove me completely crazy to see such a disservice done to this character. Granted I don’t think she would have been happy as part of a Royal Harem either (what happened to her dreams of seeing the world?!?) but to just have her completely give up on life without trying to find a work around while NY “nobly soldiers on” was a completely crap ending. She was not weak and to commit sucicide because she couldn’t handle being used as a lightening rod for rebellion completely disregarded everything we spent the last 69 episodes defining her character as.
Sorry rant over- I’m really happy to have found your blog since the book isn’t in English and I’m not quite ready to let go of these characters yet.
Thanks for your hard work!
As much as suicide was kinda out of place ending for our heroine in the drama, I think you guys will see fairly soon that it would have been an even more ridiculous and unrealistic ending for the novel. Unlike our heroine who is a bit more idealistic in the drama, our heroine in the novel is first and foremost a survivor- a girl who will never give up no matter how desperate the situation is.